2005 unplugged

music: the wind and approaching storm
mood: somber, reflective, as it should be

Yes, yes, its about that time. One last ditch effort to recap the year. To pretend that by blogging it excuses me from not calling or writing each member of the cast of my life personally nearly as often as I should. Let this serve as your impetous to communicate for real or not. The year in review is one of the most crowded in recent memory and difficult I think as well. It was a year of not being honest as I would like to myself but I think that allowed me to experiement in many ways and break the mold and that indeed brought at least filler if not soild experience to my life. LAte nights at work, juggling many projects at once, and letting the "what I should be doing" haunt and contorl more then is sane, certainly played a role in the chaos of 2005.

Three different houses and moves in 5 months, 5 if you include the fact that for the previous months I had been living between the lounge and parents. As each issue arised, I wondered what the point was, what the test was. I can tell you now, clearly, there really wasn't one. I'm "settled" now as much as I can be, I'm content on most days, have made some great friends, and still we know things are not what they really should be. We acknowledge that they are significantly better in the housing department though. 11 roomates total this year ( not including Chris Tann and my parents) and now we are down to 3 and 1/2, and that is almost a family I suppose. I've committed to being here 6 more months, we will see what happens then.

This year I lost two of the best dogs ever created, and welcomed in a nephew who embodies the spirit of one of them (Romeo,) they even seem to have the same smile. Bear visited me even last night in my dream and I can't help but feel he is not as free as I would have hoped he would be by this time. Metaphorical peas in a pod perhaps. They never discovered to my knowledge what it was that ailed him, and that will be a heartache for many reasons I'm sure for many years to come. Also brought into the world this year, Anisha, the long awaited child of my former roomate and dear friend Anu, Tristan, coworker jeff's new son, and Olivia, Abby and Cesar ( friends from my sailing to Greece).

I watched as two of my best friends in the world tie the provervial knot finally, Laurina and Erin now legally bound to thier hearts desire. HOw happy and of course being me just an eensy weensy bit jealous their luck was so wel...lucky =] And how can I forget the engagement of my brother to one of the sweetest and most fun women I've met. Their April wedding is being looked forward to inmensely. The family grows.

My yellow jeep, was paid off in full this year, something I own, something I finally feel I accomplished. He hit 80K miles this week and at 5 years old this december, we make a pretty dashing couple. I turned 30 with very little to do, I continue to pay off debts and loans, but a 19% raise to catch me up to "market value" and compensate me for some of the extra responsibility I took on at the job helped to cushion the blow of unexpected costs (airline tickets to weddings, car repair, speeding tickets etc)

This year I did not see a doctor at all, donated blood 4 times, had no colds that I can remember anyway, and directed no plays. I did however have two leading roles and am rehearsing for the third play of the year. Acting is more emotional than directing sometimes, and it was fitting that my rule of one onstage gig increased 3 fold. Time to be told what to do instead of be relied upon to have the answers I guess. Telling in a way. I wonder how much longer that will be the case.

This year I decided South Beach Dieting was not for me, ever, and discovered that even a sexual fling (or three actually) tend to result in friendships more than anything else. I discover I'm not there yet in terms of healing, but don't have a benchmark either for how much is enough and when one is done. At least time is paying attention to me though, I think, one of these days it wont' hurt so much and it will feel good. I know, I know, I don't sound convincing, but I've asked the fairies to help me out just this once in return for cakes and sweets. They are talking it over, they said they would get back to me. A discovery early last week sent me over the edge when I discovered that a bag I had thrown out due to a spider infestation on it most likely contained a small box that held exactly 6 cards and mementos Chris had given me. Every bit of proof I was once possibly loved in that way, gone in a careless instant. And simulatneously symbolic in a way, and pathetic that I could put such emphasis on the material. That I needed proof, that I even need love when I've spent the vast majority of my life knowing I don't. To infinity and beyond.

A hair stylist lost is a hair stylist found, My mother located the women who cut my hair through the guy that cuts her hair just last night. So even when I don't feel good, I will look good...maybe. We try to end this year amd the recap on a good note.

New years will see me finish my play adaptation, go on a date in Mill Valley, and spend New years Eve with My brother and his fiance, my sister and her husband, and family friends Brian and Hasan in San Francisco. Quiet nibbling, chatting and hoping for better for us and all our loved one. This time next year perhaps our tropps will be out of Iraq, our noses out of other people's business, a few new and a few old friends will bring laughter into our hearts, which perhaps will be a little lighter. We can alwyas hope. Until next year.

Wishing everyone a happy, healthy, life transforming year to come.

princess on 12.30.05 @ 01:02 PM PST [link]

Sunday, December 18th

Deer, Dogs and Dynamics

music: Itunes
mood: meeeooowww

Buckets. It is raining Buckets. Well Not REAAALL Buckets, but I mean the quantity of water...could be coming out of buckets not drops. Haven't seen rain like this since El Nino of I guess 98? I dashed out to get a few stocking stuffers at the Walgreens and got caught in a bit of a flood. I hadn't intended to be out long and so I of course was just wearing an old pair of rubber soled tiger slippers. I think I paid 2.99 for them at rite aid a few years back. They are my slumming slippers. Were. Leave no man behind, but slippers...well.. if I hadn't been afriad the weak plastic bags would break and dump all my new purchases in the puddle I might not have even been running ( I do love the feel of rain) but since there was no sense in throwing the few precious dollars I had away, I was clipping across the parking lot to the jeep and making waves in the puddles as I went. I could feel the water seeping in, then soaking...like a gunshot wound as the blood spreads...and when one of the slippers fell off, I didn't REALLY think about it...SAVE YOURSELF MAN, I heard the slipper yell out. Very cinderella. And yet, no prince in sight. I got the goods safe to the car, flicked the left shoe off in the car and drove over to the scene of the crime. It was too late, I can't imagine it will dry off and ever be the same, post traumatic puddle syndrome...but at least I saved it. I came very close to leaving the poor sad animal print foot wear there, leaving it to its watery death...but ultimately I didn't have the heart. I will salvage what I can...it's only water right?

So who let the dogs out? Either there's a Tsunami a comin or people do not love their dogs. I have seen 4 dogs wandering the dark winding curves around my house over the last week. I helped one beagle back to its house, but the boxer and the chihuahuas weren't where I could get to them without putting myself in danger blind curves being...well...blind. I can only hope that they don't end up like the deer I saw on Wed Morning. It was a young buck, not the mom or the babies I don't think, but it was dead. Which makes me wonder, wher do deer live exactly. I mean foxes live in dens, bears in caves or dens, lots of animals live in dams, burrows, holes, nests....where does a deer live. It would appear they do not dig much...how strange to me, to not create a shelter or a home...seems like my only goal this year really...

And speaking of home...had a house outting with the roommates this past week. Jimmy "Stop signs are optional in my country" Wong drove me to the great mall where we met up with Justin "my salavary gland blocked up dammit" Zazzi and Scott "I have to work after this, you all owe me" Boyd. It was quite amusing. Our Dynamic is pretty hysterical, I would have liked to been able film the expression on Scott and Justin's face when they discovered I chose to save seats in the second to last row. Jimmy and I wanted to sit in Reclining seats in the back, Scott and Justin wanted to sit in the front. Everything in the center was taken. So Jimmy and I gave in...this time....

We saw the Narnia movie, and I was ultimately dissappointed with the lack of HEART that went into the movie. I of course have a special attatchment to the story, having directed Lion the witch and the wardrobe last year, but even that prejudice aside, I thought they could have been more consistant and had more magic. Harry Potter, whether you like it or not, you have to admit, there is never anything half ass about it...it's consistant and true to the spirit. I saw that on the IMAX. Fun experience, but the IMAX is better when the movie is made specifically for the theatre.... GREAT SOUND though,,, worth it.

It was a big week for Theatre last week too...Saw Romance in D which was the best piece of theatre I think I have seen since "What the Birds Carry" At the Pear. Saw Pride and Prejudice at the Rep as well ( Free tickets, aaaaw yeah) But having been in that show, I thought maybe I was a bit too biased to fully enjoy it. It was very clever, and very different, and ultimately a cohesive, enjoyable piece, but required a specific mind set and a certain amount of buying into in order to accept some of the concepts. A Good translation of the book....I don't plan on seeing the movie. I alos got to see Beach Blanket Babylon in SF with former roommate Brian Dodge. It was lavish, we had GREAT seats, and though VERY bizarre, I mean REALLY bizarre the free champange, wine, buffet at Magna Rose's afterwards matched my divine company. Had a super, SUPER time as always. This was the 4th annual Bri Dodge Work Party invitational and I always look forward to it. It's not just the free food and entertainment, it's the company. This year I was fortunate enough to see Brian Dodge 2 times in a week as he was able to attend my housewarming party last week. I think I have now seen him more times in the last 4 years then I ever did in the 6 months we lived in San Jose. He met Anu ( also a former roommate, and my current roommates) and it became a game of who hasn't lived with Susannah...or been in a play with her...

This week I have tickets to the Sublime: Nutcracker by Ballet San Jose Silicon Valley, and the Ridiculous: Rocky Horror Picture Show, at the Hoover. Chris Tann is Riff Raff, and it's one of those dream roles that you just can't wait to see someon play. Like Kate in Taming of the Shrew for me...one day...and when I do, the world better be there opening night =].

Neflix has been getting a healthy use, as I procrastinate from my writing, the only real way I know how (Cleaning and watching movies). I have seen a graet many lame flicks, (Punch drunk love, The Singing Detective, Phantom of the Opera) and a couple of great ones, Millions (4 out of 5 rugters/rockwells) and Fairytale a True Story (also 4 out of 5). Next up some more daniel day lewis, a Johnny Depp one I somehow missed, and Amityville Horror, all which can keep me company on New Years which will most likely be spent..."chilling" (read: I don't ski and I don't do SF). Mark July 7th as opening night for the next Pirates of the Carribean Movie....looks AWESOME.

Much more later...time to write for real...

princess on 12.18.05 @ 10:05 PM PST [link]

Thursday, December 8th

Niece, Hawk, and Slice

music: None
mood: What mood?

This just in....I have the cutest niece ever. At 2, she's running around, laughing and talking. Everything is funny to her and her spanish is coming along too. I'm impressed that she remembers being at my parents house from a year ago. Amazing little mind, and very silly. Westly all of 5 months was asleep when I arrived, so I didn't get to see him, but hopefullly I will get a chance tonight to visit with him. So many stories, and not enough time to share them. Needless to say though, all very entertaining. I like them better when they can talk, and she's a TRUE greenwood in that respect.

Saw a beautiful and HUGE hawk on my way to work yesterday morning. I stopped the car to look at him sitting on a telephone pole checking out the view of the entire silicon valley. Must be pretty cool to be a bird. He checked me out, I think he like my yellow car, and I had a moment of wonder as I pondered how many people would see, and even care about this creature. I'm sre there are plenty of people who would drive right by. It's second nature for me really. I grew up in nature I guess and that plays a part but...well...anyway..not sure where I am going with that...

Auditions, Callbacks, and Casting for Pear slices in one foul swoop. I passed up audtitions for two shows I really wanted to be in because of work load, but broek down and made an appointment to Audition since I have to do boxoffice and house managment for them anyway. Great group of actors, and the ensemble was chosen. We have a table reading of the 8 short locally written pieces which the sides for were really great on Monday....I will find out which parts I am (2-4 characters) then...I look at it as a good tool to structure my time, a new social outlet, a great opportunity to work with writers and, $200 stipend..my biggest acting gig yet...Mark your calendars for opening night....February 10th.

cool eh?
princess on 12.08.05 @ 01:00 PM PST [link]

Website designed and maintained by

Princess Susannah AKA Susannah Greenwood

There have been visitors to this page.

Princess Susannah's Web Footed Blog Palace

2005 unplugged

Deer, Dogs and Dynamics

Niece, Hawk, and Slice