Beat the Sunrise home update...

music: street noise
mood: Sleepy with a full bladder

It's getting late ( or early rather) but it's been a while. Something Philosophical..or not...directors notes from the upcoming Lion Witch and the Wardrobe...

There are forces in this world. Forces that have the power to corrupt, demoralize, exhaust and cast great and painful doubt upon ourselves. Forces that have the power to destroy and deter us from our paths. There are also forces that guide, galvanize and inspire. Clandestine patient forces whose whispers of hope help to light a path sometimes murky and confused. Fickle and fierce or steadfast and magnanimous, there are undeniable forces at work.

These forces have many names and take infinite shapes. They disguise themselves at times, and thrust their presence on us in bold display at others. They change. They shift, the combat each other. Every atom is a potential battle ground. Every Adam a potential hero. Be it land, mind, or spirit, battles are being waged. On Earth, in Narnia, and elsewhere, no world literal or figurative, tangible or imagined is exempt from these essential struggles of balance. And these forces are timeless and continual reminders that life is choice and choices are journeys. Reminders that sometimes the questions are the answers and some questions have no answers.

These battles, these forces, they test. They test us sometimes to tears, or drive us to rage, or to judgment that is too quickly arrived at. They help us to determine for ourselves what is fair and what is not, and help us to realize there is no black and white. Life is the stuff between the absolutes, the journey through the grey and even absolutes have their moments of cloudy uncertainty.

Sometimes the smallest victories have the most meaningful lesson, sometimes the losses are not always a loss. Sometimes the victories aren’t at all and every battle faught, no matter the size, paves the stones of the path of the next journey.

In other news...My sister REbecca who lives in London is pregnant again, Second child...the first one just 10 months old is wearing her out as it is...but should be great to see how the second one turns out. Due in May, She and her husband Mark will be out for xmas so I will get to visit with her longer than I did this last time.

Happy Birthday to Erin Hays who is FINALLY engaged after what..8 years or so....no details yet on the wedding but Laurina and I are already to wear the same dress whether she likes it or not.

Winner of the week: Everyone who votes next week (particularly for Kerry). I will be awaiting election results after tech rehearsal at a cuban bar in Palo Alto.

Loser of the Week: The Producers or executives on Channel 3 who decided to run reruns of ER and Joey on the ONE night I was off of rehearsal and didn't have to tape them. Grrrrrrr.

If you are in the area go see what me and about 40 other people have been working on for the last 4 months... Lion witch opens Friday...It LOOKS BEAUTIFUL!!!

princess on 10.30.04 @ 02:14 AM PST [link]

Thursday, October 21st

Yatching, oddities and Eating Disorder.

music: Cake - Comfort Eagle
mood: Pissy

Real quick bits for you today since I am mad agro trying to to a bazillion and one things today. In no particular order....

Been following the Global Challenge 2004 yacht race as my friend Don who was skipper of the boat I sailed in Greece for 3 weeks with a few years back, is on the crew of one of the yachts racing. Pretty exciting to read the logs. Would be such a great experience, but a long time for people to be away from friends and family...still...ARG..very pirate like. Take a glance...

And speaking of Pirates. I did a bit of my own urban piracy today as the Arts council opened their old office for leftover scavengers. I grabbed myself a New chair. A comfy burlapy rusty brown chair that looks like it came out of dr. Evil's office. It's kick butt, keeps my back warm and allows for me to sit cross legged in a much more ergonamic manner. Arg.

We had a group lunch today to say goodbye to one of our coworkers and even better than a free lunch is watching how people eat. I watched the last piece of lettuce for our lettuce wrap appetizers sit there as the 6 other people at my table just picked at the filling. Finally I HAD to say something. SOMEONE TAKE THE LAST PIECE OF LETTUCE! And they did. I also watched them serve the appetizers and everyone just waited....and waited. Finally the girl from the big family (that's me) who knows that if you finish first you might get seconds ( and more importantly if you don't you might not) took the initiative, broke the ice and helped her self. If going first is rude fine, I think it's only polite not to let the food get cold and guest go hungry. Trail bblazers unite.

Two RANDOM things I realized today. 1) at any given time ther is a very good chance of hearing a Nirvana song on the radio...seriously...switch the radio station around and most times after just a couple of stations you will hear one. Interesting. 2) I saw a blue chair in the bathroom stall today. All sorts of perverse images came to mind but curiosity more than anything. WHO put it in there and WHY. I will give a dollar to the person who comes up with the most logical. Personally I think it wasa prank on someone...steal their chari and hide it where they probably won't find it...funny...

Oaky kids... try to have a good Thursday...Mine may go right into Friday....
and Saturday...and Sunday...

princess on 10.21.04 @ 04:29 PM PST [link]

Wednesday, October 20th

Sausages, Lions, and Dwarves oh my!

music: None
mood: Tense with a full bladder...must make time to pee

Well, it's been a busy week battling left and right all manor of things. Karma ( which you can't really BATTLE persae) the man, time, emotion, you name it....Battle battle battle, I'm sore and tired from it. By the looks of my sheets every morning I may not be winning, but I'm putting up a good firght. They end up mostly on the floor and I wake up with no circulation in my right arm the other day. No visible wounds though so there you go.

Rant of the Day: A note to all Palo Alto residents. If you SEE a mountain Lion, DO NOT CALL THE POLICE. They just end up shooting the poor things. Police are for catching speeders and red light runners not shooting cats taht have just as much right to the trees and creeks as we do. Call Animal control instead if you HAVE to. Mountain lions deaths accounted for 2 in Califonia in the last 12 years....I don't THINK this shoud be a major terrorist threat and send the yuppie citizens into a tizzy. They should be more concerned about thier SAusage kings....and what a great segue for the winner of the week..a man that did what so many of us would like to do with the dispensers of red tape....The Sausage King killed some meat inspectors. I don't condone violence (usually), and the man faces the death penalty for his action but I find it very Tarantinoesque. You don't like my sausage... BOOM! And so the winner of the week...Sausage King.

If you get Kteh channel 10 in San Jose, and are a Sci Fi fan, Look for me on TV working the phones during the Red Dwarf Marathon Pledge Break 6pm-11pm. Chris and I will be slaving away taking pledge money while Craig Charles, who plays the dreamy and stinky curry breathed sass mouth Lister on the series will be in the Studio. Our goal is to get him drunk is a pub afterwards and let us blackmail him into a role in the Red Dwarf movie. Or not.

Topics of blog to come soon...maybe even tonight as I isten to the latest installment of The BBC radio program Hitchhikers Guide tot he Galaxy) Posesion and Ownership, What happens when you search for Susannah Greenwood on the internet, The arts council fundraiser, Things I have learned and What is Sex, no really...what IS it.

Have a good one!

Cheers!

princess on 10.20.04 @ 06:06 PM PST [link]

Monday, October 18th

Weekend Udate

music: Howie Day - Australia
mood: Sleepy and sniffly, sore.

The low down.....

Spent Friday night getting lost and in a mad panic trying to get from the fabric store to opening night of The Second Lady, which I directed. The Reception was Champagney and Hors D'oevrey and most of our audience seemed to enjoy it. There were Line flubs and some energy issues but I think now that opening is over the cast will relax a bit and start to find the groove. The show is now theirs and I hope my schedule will allow me to see a show or two of it per weekend. AS a celebration I saw TEam America with Chris and a few of the cast memebers. I thought staying awake would be a probalem after the long week but apparently $1 whoppers is all I need to perk right up. The Movie was hands down the most entertaining thing I have seem in months, if not this year. A much needed laugh that lasted probably 80% of the movie prooved to be therapeutic.

Saturday's Fight Choreography rehearsal and Book club meeting went well and I even caught a bit of Saturday night live on TV. Sunday brought humid sprinkles or rain, perfect whether for gardening...less sweat, sunburn and dehydration. I spent a good couple of hours shoveling bark over exposed plastic in the garden. End result looks much better and the rain blended it with the old bark. I'm sore, but that's good, I feel like it was a good physical outlet and I love it when I can tangilbly see a result to hard work. Once Chris lays the plastic down on the side of the house in the back I can maybe attack that. I know technically I don't live there anymore, but I still love that h ouse and plot and want to help omprove it...plus its just too huge a project for Chris to do especiialy since he has been fighting off a relentless cold...he's not sick but has just been on the edge for a bout a week, so it makes me feel good to help out a bit.

The highlight of the weekend for me was a chance to really relax and enjoy some "family" time only not with my own. Chris invited a bunch of friends over to watch all three oroginal Star Wars DVDs on his big projector screen. WE laid out a huge matress, futons, pillows and a bunch of comforters, made big bowls of popcorn, and all piled up with drinks or our choosing. There were 5 kids under 4-11 and several parents all cuddly about the lounge, and a dog that was in heaven getting stray popcorn, and snuggling up to kids of all ages. It was such fun to watch the kids ( and adults even ) who hadn't seen the movie react and great to laugh at Chris and I reciting the lines. And what an AWESOME soundtrack. Woud have to be on my top three list of best soundtracks and maybe the best music ever.

Kids may tire you out, but watching them last night made me feel younger than I have in weeks. Everyone but chris and I left after the first one and we made it to the ewok scene of the third before letting the weekend catch up with us. I fell asleep with Bear on the sea of cushions on the floor of the Lounge, Chris made it back to his room. A good memory for a cloudy rainy Sunday.

My Jeep was a swimming pool this morning...the top was being fixed with a new zipper which I picked up this morning before work, but it was pretty soggy en route. That's what jeeps are for though...just got to dry it out a bit so it doesn't mold. Ewww. Looking forward to focusing on Lion Wtich and Wardrobe a bit this week with 4 rehearsals in a row whoo hoo! Should make lots of progress.

Winner of the week for last week: Fully organic corn from the back yard which ROCKS! How cool to just pick it and cook it. Go figure. yummy

Loser of the Week: The City of Santa Clara and it's street lay out. Very confusing.

My jeep turned into a swimming pool
princess on 10.18.04 @ 02:42 PM PST [link]

Friday, October 15th

Voting, competition and Al Gore's internet

music: Russell Watson Opera
mood: worked up...

So much to write about, I will try to keep it short...try being the operative word. On second thought...better sit back, grab thta beer and get comfortable...this could be a long one....bear with me...some good stuff...

princess on 10.15.04 @ 04:33 PM PST [more..]

Tuesday, October 12th

Firsts and The Return of the Redheaded Discount.

music: Oliver, The Musical/Weird Al
mood: Focused for the time being

So, I rocked up to my parents house this morning after soaking at the "spa" for a clensing and I was greeted by a a Kerry and Edwards sign in the front yard. Hmmm I thought. I wonder if Dad knows that there. SO I inquired within. Thought my father is indeed one of the most politically opinionated and active people I know (save you Jamie) he (and my mother) have NEVER placed ANY political sign in the yard, bumper sticker or publicized thier views to the general public via and banner or pamphlet ( Save the Flag going up on military holidays, when Jason my borther in law was in Iraq, and the Brazillian flag during WorldCup Soccer in 92.) If you ask him, he will tell you his thoughts, and sometimes you don't even need to ask him and he'll tell you, but just like I was raised, he does not preach, he lets those walking by the house make up their own minds. So, you can see why I was intrigued by this not so small indication of the house feelings on this election. Pus from a gardening perspective, I think my parents have always felt that signs were tacky. They live in a pretty liberal area so I don't think they are worried about having their cars keyed, but I have NEVER seen a sign in our yard. So of course my assumption was, Dad didn't know. Here's actually how it went down. My Brother Sandy, conversational wizard and stranger to none was in the front yard when a man walked by and asked if he could put the sign in the yard. He said sure. The man did. Dad saw the saw, asked where it came from, Sandy told him and then he asked mom if she wanted it moved. She said no. And there it stayed. Since mom has never voted, I guess this is the way she petitions the Bush Administration. That and yelling at him on TV and calling him an evil idiot at intense volumes. So, even late into life, your parents can surprise you. There is always time apparently for a first.

And speaking of firsts.. I have an interview with Children's Musical Theatre San Jose for a directing position tomorrow...my choices would be a musical version of Tom Sawyer, Sleeping beauty with 6-9 year olds, or Bye Bye Birdie....The timing of Tom and Birdie are better but birdie is not my favorite. We shall see. Also Auditioning for a show at the Pear theatre in a few weeks.

On a different note...B flat I think...I went to the Auto Interior place to get my Jeep window zipper fixed ( yes, it is a large version of a Fischer Price Car...it it held together with zippers) and the guy quoted me $150 plus tax. Hmm. It's $240 to replace the whole new window. I went in and two funny things happened. He needed the top of the jeep to match the zipper and I said that was fine, I just didn't bring tools to remove it. And of course he said...."I can take your top off for you". He then corrected himself ans said the top of your jeep....it was funny. So now that he was embarrassed I figured I could work it to my advantage. I have vowed to never make poor financial choice again and this new philosophy include not being too shy to ask for a discount. So he asked if he had given me a quote over the phone when I called in the day before and I said "yes, $150, but I think becuase i am cute and redheaded I should get a discount." He smiled and said " I agree on the cute and redheaded part, tell you what $120 flat if you pay cash." And that....is kicking ass. So there you go...My red hair and perhaps my balls are worth at least 20%...and I wasn't even showing any cleavage. This redheaded discount worked once before in the flower district in SF many years ago when I went with my friend Tom to get palm fronds for Props for JCS. I think I was only taking in about a 10% discount there thought if I recall correctly. I also asked for Chai a week or so ago and they were out, so I said, fine can I have the display chai from the box on the counter. he said sure, and gave it to me free and gave me a free refill on regular chai the next week. So you you see, it pays to ask.

Presently I'm working on trying to get tickets for a KTEH pledge event, to meet Craig Charles who plays Lister on Red Dwarf. this one is a long shot...it was a $180 pledge prize, and I'm asking prety much to get in for free....fingers are crossed...

Smoke me a kipper...
princess on 10.12.04 @ 01:10 PM PST [link]

Monday, October 11th

Holiday Mixup!

music: Some weird stuff ron is subjecting the office to.
mood: Queasy and distracted...oh and mildy amused

So, our early bird Jeff who usually is the first one in the office was abnormally absent from the office this morning when I walked in just before 10. 10:30 came and went and our little Jeff was still amiss. ( well a Mister still, but you know what I mean. And then he appeared online. A quick IM confirmed that Jeff was celebrating Columbus day with a day off. Hmm...we all thought looking at our various calendars. Yes, we knew it was columbus day, but this wasn't a day we thought the office observed. Then I looked at my yahoo calendar. I had the holiday written down, but for tomorrow, not today. Interesting. Might have been nice to sleep in today. So further investigation followed. I whipped out my 2003 holiday sheet that was given out to me when I was hired, Jeff looked at his from 2002, noone seemed to have a 2004 list. Both calendars we did have though listed columbus day as a Monday Holiday. VERY interesting. SO, Againsts Ed's instructions Jeff comes into work, and I head off down the hall to do some dectective work. And HERE'S the scoop.

The folks in the office across the hall VOTED at a staff meeting to MOVE the holiday to FRIDAY becuase they are moving to the 5th flor and will be shut down Friday and Monday. SO, not only did they VOTE to MOVE a Holiday ( I didn't know you could do that), they voted to EXTEND the Holiday as well ( Can I do that with other holidays and what constitutes a fair vote?) and somehow we at the other end of the hall who are not moving, were left to work on a day that is debateably the most anti clamactic and pointless Holiday (although strangely enough it is celebrated in parts of South America as well). SO, the Artsopolis crew had a brief meeting once I reported the important news.

WE have a board meeting on Friday, so we can't take Friday off. Jeff and Ron will be coming in Monday and part of Sunday to help with Computer hook up for the new office. So the decision was made, we can take 1-2 days off with pay this week or next on our own. I have decided I will probably take Tuesday Morning at least off to treat myself to Watercourse Way hour of hot tub soak and steam and get my jeep window zipper fixed and visit with my niece a bit who is visiting from London. Then I would need to decide which other day or partial day I should take off. I was looking at lists of Holidays this week and next and looking at my schedule to see when it would make most sense...here are some possibilities...

My favorites include...National Pet Peeve Week (Like moving holidays without telling people. I don't move my birthday do I??? Though that would be kinda cool, and while I am at it, let's make my birthday a nationally observed day)

National Kick Butt Day ( that's today..and I don't know what it means, but it kicks butt!)

National Pork month...Need I say more. It's the other white meat holiday.

I could also make up my own Holiday...I could celebrate the opening of Team America: World Police and see a matinee...but that would be no fun unless at least one other person was celebrating the day as well at the same time...

I could celebrate the opening of the play I am directing.... but it's already being celebrated sort of on Friday with the opening night champagne reception.

So I suppose if anyone can think of a good reason to take a day off over another, if anyone wants to play hookey, if anyone wants to make up a Holiday, I am up for suggestions. Then again, since the spirit behind celebrating a relatively arbitrary day has been left up to me, maybe since Columbus was such an explorer, I will celebrate his "day" by adding a day to a vacation next time I get one. I figure I can afford at least a 2 month long paid vacation adventure somewhere around August-January of 2006.

Hope your "Holi" day is great no matter what you are celebrating.

cool eh?

princess on 10.11.04 @ 02:51 PM PST [link]

Thursday, October 7th

It ain't over til its over

music: Bear Snoring
mood: So very sorrowful

I am baffled often times, as often as I am intrigued, by the English (American) language. Especially in my attempt to study other languages I have found certain phrases or uses of words to be of particular confusion. Take the phrase...."to be over it". What does that MEAN? I think of a hurdle...not a metaphorical one ( or maybe I do) but a physical hurdle. When you are "OVER IT" it is behind you. But it's still there, and the hurdle it's self doesn't change, nor do I when I jump over it. I suppose I could feel better when I get over it, as if I have achieved something, but really, I only have a nother hurdle to get over, what's the point. By being over it, nothing has really changed, in fact it only gets harder, a more intense test of endurance awaits. But you get to the end you say, but do you? How many races to your run? By getting over it, I've moved forward, I have honestly, I can mostly control the tears, but what is the benefit of getting over it. In the process of getting over a hurdle you are momentarily above it. You perhaps have a different prespective, look at it from a few different angles, but ultimately, nothing has changed, it's mostly illusion. Hurdles still there.

"I'm through it".is an interesting one too. A swamp comes to mind. I may be through it, I may be at the other end and out of it, but it is no doubt all over me. OVER. How can a swamp be all over me, when I'm still stuck with the swamp?

I'm not over it despite jumping up down and all around the hurdle in search of the finality of over. And maybe I fear a future of and emotional zombie like state of "over". When something is over, one should get over it, but often times endings and beginnings are so blurred I can't tell when or more importantly why it's OVER. What constitutes an over, when one or more parties/objects is not OVER IT. Only one can be over something at the same time can't they? But should "over" be mutual? And then I think, there would be no need to run if it there was agreement. Maybe "over" neccessitates having to move, make a move, move away while one things stands still and allows itself to become over. Unless they are beside...I'll come back to "beside" soon. It's all very complex.

So I'm not over. I boycott that phrase and phaze of "progress" becuase it is hypocritical, repressive, and dillusional. I am more honest with myself than that for the most part. I will find a more appropriate preposition or whatever part of speech the things you can do to a tree are. I was in and then forced out, but even being pushed out pushed me IN something else. I was in deep, then I was in deeper when I wasn't in, but I guess I was still in or else I wouldn't have been able to be deeper in that other thing. I used to be under it, or rather is was on top of me, smothering and sufficating, weighting me down. I got out from underneath it I think, though at times it remains difficult to tell. I know that some will judge and say I am around it. I have done my share of going around and around to be sure. I think I am out of that phaze...or very nearly. I feel I approach being beside it. In otherwords it may not go away. It may be within reach all my life. And that is a frighteningly depressing and simultaneously a potentially comforting concept if it were true. BEside doesn't leave it behind, it doesn't walk all over it, It doesn't smother, or delude. Progress in healing I think is as much about being able to walk beside it, and have that be okay, and to know it's there, but to also know you can walk beside many than it is being over.

And then again, maybe I wouldn't say that if I were in fact over it. Maybe the whole point is to fool yourself into thinking over is better. It just sounds more bitter not better to me. But then again it's all painful at this point so what does the label really matter other than to give me something to babble about.
princess on 10.07.04 @ 12:39 AM PST [link]

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