08/16/2004: "Artsopolis"

music: This is Alice Music 7
mood: Sleey and a bit punchy

After a couple of good days of sleep 9 best in a long time) I was up early this morning to take a friend to the Airport. It's 2pm and I have already been up for 8 hours. This being said I am fading fast, the Futon in the office is looking pretty good. All I need is Apple juice and gram crackers and I am back to practicing everything I need to know which I learned in Kindergarten. It occurs to me as we yell about in the office/room today that I haven't shared the sitcom that is my work life. thre are huge amounts of things going on right now at work, big things, secret things and so on but between the long hours and deadlines we have some heavy discussions. We wax some serious philosophy. I am certainly in my element. A brief discription and insight into my coworkers...

Ed: Ed is our Captain, the boss, the big cheese. Oh Captain my captain. Think Newspaper editor from the Spirderman movies. Ed likes to yell. He likes to use 4 letter words (not the good kind like love, and help and flea and spam, oh no). He's a pressure cooker when he wants to be, fond of the red pen, knows more about grammer than most of my College English professors, can drink you under the table, wears sunglasses into work for that reason probably and is a big teddybear but you didn't hear it from me. He can Schmooze better than the best, has a very mysterious personal life of which I am not at liberty to go into detail, but buy him a few beers and I'm sure he will tell you all about it. Between smoking (his personal contributution to the first five childrens program) yelling and getting a lot of work done, Ed heads a campaign against cellphones. Despite sevearl meetings being cancelled as of late, and no way to reach him to notify him, he stands by his guns when he says, if he "needs" a cell phone someone else should pay for it. My hero. Ed is partial to his facial hair choosing the age defying goatee.

Jeff: Jeff is an odd creature. A wild child of the 80's, now reformed slightly, married and with a young daughter which he has been known to let fall off the bed onto her head multiple times. A brilliant rock musician (Heresay since he's never played in the office, but he appears to be legendary) though you wouldn't think so by looking at him. jeff too is fond of the facial hair and sport a goatee type doo. A man with a running list of inventions, Jeff is a tech guy, an actor as well as a musician, and comes from I hear a family of lawyers. Jeff is grounded but every now and then will randomly treat the office to a Mexican hat Dance (with sombreo) or if we are very lucky, a riverdance impression. Look for him when the Boys and Men of Artsopolis 2005 Calendar comes out in December of this year. Jeff still listens to cassettes. Jeff is very picky about his coffee. Jeff appears professional and mild mannered, but don't let his appearances fool you. He can whip out randomness and compete with the best of them. Jeff is a bit of a push over for the girls down the hall when somthing isn't working on their computers and loves the discovery channel, PBS and Poker. He might enjoy long walks on the beach too, but that's none of my beeswax.

Ron: So many words to describe Ron. Freak, goober, evil genius, only child. They all apply. And many more. Ron is the instigator, Think me on no sleep in a room full of kittend and you have Ron's defalt mode. Don't argue Ron, you know you are the instigator and you relish the title. He wants it on his business card. Ron has an unusual weakness for puns, gnomes and funny titled drinks (Pimpjuice, Dickens Cider, etc.) Ron thinks Redbull gives him wings, but we know it just makes him obnoxious. Ron is appealing a lawsuit brought against him by his office chair which recently broke from being leaned back on. Ron practices dangerous extreme sports such as taking pictures while driving, and recycle box soccer of which he was elected co-captain of Team Artsopolis. Ron likes cheesy, and I do mean CHEESY show tunes and kills on the ukelele. His Mobile phone looks like a camera/calculator, and he prefers the clean shaven look, either that or he's really a 12 year old posing as a 29year old. He makes fun of the handicapped, but in a good way. Ron is the originator of much office slang like.."cheeto please". Ron is a wizard at Photoshop among many other things, often is DJ for the office,and all around friendly guy. Maybe too friendly. Ron doesn't like germs. Ron is the guy who roughhouses with your dogs and gets them so hyper they start to foam at the mouth. Ron has been known to foam at the mouth too on occasion. Ron is the Ad man, videogame expert, social organizer of field trips to City Bagels or to get Iced Chai as a mid afternoon motivational drink for the office. ron is a cheerleader at heart...with the little outfit.

And there you go...my boys...I've many scenerios which I have recorded in my scant 3 months here which would read perfect for a Must See TV sitcom, but sometimes we think maybe the stuff in the office is only funny to us. Here are the quotes for the last couple of months...similar phrases can regularly be heard from Suite (or SWEET) 275, at 4 north 2nd street.

"You just never know with Babies" - Ed
"Hello, this is Ed, I mean Ron" - Ron
"Probably wouldn't hurt to do a guy for a while." -Jeff
"I Gave it to you without even asking, you wanted it, I could just tell" Jeff to Susannah about Chai
"I like to take my dog places and do things with him" Ron.
"I have no idea who any of the Breastrokers are?"- Susannah
"Are you sure you don't want to smell my hair" - Ron
"Tequilla shots!!!" - Ed
"I keep these boys in shape." - Susannah
"I'll let you get back to your lettuce." Jeff to Ron
"I don't mean to spoils his thunder." - Ed
"You're fat" -Ron, Ed & Jeff to Susannah, every day.

And finally our recent topic of lengthy in depth discussion...

"What does She's a brickhouse really mean?" Conclusion: She's mighty mighty, letting it all hang out, or she's stacked, got a block up front and one in back to match, she's built.