08/02/2006: "The Pony - Part the Fifth"

One o' my Most Embarrassing Experiences

(More Pony stories are h e r e)

I have of late, Parishioners,

taken holidays.

I zipped down to Melbourne for a Dear Friend's birthday
(and there is yet another Virgin Airlines story there...)


Then My Dear Mother came to visit!

I eagerly headed out to the airport
was selected for a special body search (no cavities involved, grâce à Dieu!)

and waited FOUR HOURS for the delayed flight...

I paid TEN DOLLARS!!! for a guitar magazine to help pass the time...


We messed around for a week
then 'twas time to go in to The City to meet one o' the Sestren.
We packed up, prepared to leave, rang, gave our estimated ETA
then jumped in The Pony.


Flat battery -

dead flat -

after only a week of rest!

(Parishioners may recall this happening to me about the same time last year,
when I returned from my visit to The Land of the Chrysanthemum Throne - but that was three weeks of rest!)

Aware that The Lord helps those who help themselves,
I dug out my jumper leads & found a friendly neighbour to give me a hand.

We messed around for about half an hour!

Pony wouldn't start.
It'd turn over OK
but wouldn't start.
We couldn't figure out what was going on -
I thought maybe the electrics had died.


I went down the road & bought a new battery ($80)


Pony wouldn't start.
It'd turn over OK
but wouldn't start.
I couldn't figure out what was going on -
I thought maybe the electrics had died.


I went down the road & bought a new torch ($20 - advertised the next week for $7...)


I called upon another neighbour
who certainly knows more about cars than I do
and he noticed that no fuel was being pumped to the carby (that's car talk, 'Tish...)
We thought maybe the fuel pump had died.



Mother Dear & I were distraught - we had made plans!

more Salvation below
We rang, cancelled, apologised profusely,

then rang Brother T.

'Twas a public holiday,
he was playing with his kids in the park,
he was at The Rectory in half an hour.


Parishioners may recall that Brother T is My Man!

He has bailed me out of disaster upon catastrophe upon crisis upon disaster

and this time turned out to be his Shining Hour

(and one o' my Most Embarrassing Experiences...)


Brother T is most knowledgeable in, among other things, cars.

He is a good man to learn from

because he explains things in a way even I can understand.

I told him the problem:

Pony wouldn't start.
It'd turn over OK
but wouldn't start.
I thought maybe the electrics had died,
I thought maybe the fuel pump had died.


We equipped ourselves with tools & beers
& went down to the garage.


I watched (& assisted where I could)
as he methodically, systematically, professionally
demolished the problem.


1. Fuel not getting to the carby ('Tish!). He poured metho down the carby to see if it would fire. It didn't - therefore it wasn't the fuel pump, 'twas the electrics.

2. He pulled off the distributor cap & checked the rotor button & cleaned all the contacts. They were fine, maybe we weren't getting a spark.

3. He checked the lead from the coil to the distributor. No spark. Therefore, it might be the coil.

4. Then he sent me upstairs to fetch some wire. Then he hooked one end up to the coil & sparked the other end off the battery. Much thinking ensued...

5. He switched the connections on the battery and told me to fire up. Pony starts.


Much, much embarrassment & apologising ensues.


I had hooked the jumper leads up backwards, Pony wouldn't start.

I had hooked the battery up backwards, Pony wouldn't start.

I was turning the engine backwards...


Hence no fuel getting pumped to the carby, also no spark.
Hence Pony wouldn't start.

to be continued...

lerevdr on Wed 02-Aug-2006 @ 18:28 e.s.t [click here for more SALVATION]
[4 Comments]